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Winnie’s Warriors #48 | Resilience

Hello Everyone:

 

It’s December 31st. 2014 has gone by seemingly quite quickly.

 

Wishing all a very happy and healthy 2015. Filled with hope, love, laughter and dreams that come true.

 

A dear friend sent me a book called “Resilience”. It talks about one woman’s battles with cancer – recurrent cancer. Going through things once is bad enough – but twice or more. Wow. You wouldn’t think you could do it – but somehow the strength comes. Personal power in the face of great hardship. I don’t think I could do it. But then again, I didn’t think I could have handled things the way I did the first time. J

To me the 5 year mark is a major milestone. The first of many post-cancer. The 5 year mark is a also a little scary for me. You hear about a lot of recurrence that happens in the 5-10 year zone. The end of this year marks 3 years after the completion of my treatments and surgeries. Fingers crossed – always.

 

We recently embarked on a family cruise and after seeing the commitment of my Dad and siblings working out daily in the gym, I decided it was now time to get back into shape. I have been remiss in going to the gym in the past 3-4 years (understandably of course!). I did an “in-body” assessment that told me what I already knew – I am weak (in body – not mind!!). My shape is a “C”. Meaning: need more muscle and less fat. Especially in my upper body. So I did what any normal part A-type personality would do……hired the personal trainer on the spot to put a weight training schedule/routine together for me!! LOL. By the end of the session he told me I was delicate. Probably because of all the belly-aching I was doing about the weights he was giving me!

Needless to say – although I tried to be diligent on the boat, I have only done it once since being home in the past week and a half. Sigh.

Truth be told, I’ve never been much of a gym/weight training type. So – maybe swimming and yoga?! He did tell me that neither was going to give me the muscles…..so maybe next year I’ll start again with the weights. Thankfully I have a gym in my condo – I’m really quite shy to work out in front of other people. 🙂

 

I have learned a lot about myself these past couple of years and I look to improve and grow even more into a better person overall. One thing is for sure: I always walk with the knowledge and confidence that I never walk alone. The group of Winnie‘s Warriors continues to get larger as I meet more amazing people, like all of you, whom I get to know. It’s wonderful and I am reminded of how very blessed I am.

Thanks to all of you!!

 

Looking forward to sharing another year filled with new adventures and new hopes & dreams with my very best friends, both new & old.

Happy 2015!

 

With love,

Winnie

This entry was posted on December 31, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #47 | Lest We Forget

Hello Everyone:

 

Another day of Remembrance. Today is Remembrance/Veterans Day in North America.

 

It is always important to remember. Today we remember all the brave souls who made the ultimate sacrifice and have helped given us the freedom we enjoy today. Talk about bravery and courage in the face of adversity! We owe so much.

 

This past weekend I attended two charity gala events. It is amazing how the community comes together to help support each other.

 

The first was for a local city where participants took 40 hours of dance lessons and then performed like Dancing with the Stars. The commitment of the stars was amazing. Even more amazing was my friend, who is only 23 years old. I found out that evening that she started a foundation called Dancers for Cancer. She is awesome!

 

The second was for the Sick Kids Hospital Foundation called Smiles of Innocence. It was the 17th annual gala. All the administrative work is done by volunteers so that more dollars go directly to the work of the foundation. It was heart-wrenching to watch the videos of the babies, young kids and teenagers having to battle severe ailments, including one who had her cancer come back 4 times in her young life. Some survived, many did not. But this hospital gives every one of them a fighting chance. I remember when I first attended this event, it was shortly after I had finished treatment. I was so overwhelmed I couldn’t stay in the room. This time I had to close my eyes. I can only hope that should I be felled with the same fate of battling again that I can find that same strength.

 

I reflected back on my own journey so far and know how lucky and blessed I am. I watched my video again on You Tube. I feel the need and want to do more to help. To give back more. I’ve been a little exhausted and overwhelmed this past while but I know I can help make a difference. In fact, a Warrior wrote me today to let me know that I have made an impact. How sweet!!

 

(For those who couldn’t open the link in the last email – search You Tube: CIBC Run for the Cure – Winnie Go).

 

I close with this African proverb:

If you want to go fast – go alone.

If you want to go far – go together.

 

I’m glad we are on this journey TOGETHER. Thank you!!

Smile. Be grateful.

Love always. Winnie xo

This entry was posted on November 11, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #46 | Running for the Cure & Making an Impact

Hi Everyone!

 

What an amazing day. October 5th, 2014. The CIBC Run for the Cure where I was the Survivor speaker. 18 of Winnie’s Warriors came out for the run.  I have attached a couple of pictures the foundation sent to me. I had planned to send this update out earlier, but it has taken me a long time to figure out how to get the video  my brother and sister took uploaded to You Tube. Here it is!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6Z3hiVcZjY&feature=youtu.be

 

While I was standing at the side of the stage, and Cynthia Mulligan, the MC was making the introduction, when she said my name and the Warriors who were there cheered, I nearly lost it. It was un-nerving enough to be sharing my story at the largest event of the day (65 cities across Canada do the run on the same day with 13.000 strong in Toronto). The emotion I felt was unbelievable. I was scared and excited. It was a crazy feeling.

 

After my speech and I had joined my group on the field for the warm up,  the CEO of CIBC (the main sponsor of the event and one of Canada’s big banks) came up to me and asked to have our picture taken – a selfie- he said I made him cry. He told me: “Your speech was terrific and your courage is admirable. We were all fortunate to have you share your story with us.”

 

At the end of the day while looking out at the city lights reflecting on the day’s events, I felt really great. I felt like I had done something worthwhile. It made me smile inside.

 

IMPACT – there are all different kinds that can be made. Sometimes with money, or action. What happened at the Run For The Cure was small today but I hope to make even bigger ones in the future.

 

As previously mentioned, I was going to speak at a reconstruction workshop for Women’s College Hospital. There were about a dozen ladies at the workshop I attended.  I shared my story and experiences with them. Then, although I wasn’t sure if I was going to disrobe, at the end I figured if it would help someone else then why not? One staff stood guard at the doorway to make sure that no one else walked in the room. So I said, if someone did, they’d have to pay to see me! Haha.

A couple of the ladies have reached out to me since then. We’ll be having lunch and/or coffee in the next few weeks. Another small impact I think.

 

I also had a visit with my surgeon. She did a once over and said I was healing well. Better news was she didn’t feel any new lumps or bumps. Phew. But taking tamoxifen for 10 years might be the new norm. Oh well. I guess I can live with that.

 

In the last couple of years, I have felt that I’ve lost my way. But slowly and surely, with the help of my friends, I have felt more and more that I am back! Oddly enough, it may not seem like much has changed – especially from the outside looking in – but I feel different. I feel better. I feel that there is much to look forward to. I feel HOPE again!

I’d like to find someone special to ‘hang out’ with as I’m not convinced that I’m ready to be a spinster. Although I have wanted Hasbro to use my face on the “Old Maid” card game. LOL. I’ve been pretty consumed with getting better and finding my way the last while. I think I’m ready now. Baby steps first. Will start to look around and pay more attention to my surroundings. Apparently I turn a lot of heads, however I haven’t paid much attention. But, as a girlfriend recently told me, not only do I have to keep my eyes open, but I have to keep my heart open as well. Although I am happy doing my own thing and spending time with friends & family, I guess there is something to be said about curling up with somebody, having popcorn and renting a movie on a Saturday night. We’ll see. I think in theory it sounds good – I do love my peaceful space. J

We’ll see what happens. My mother is horrified that I am going to end up alone and it breaks her heart to even think it. L

 

This journey of mine continues and I am so very blessed to have each and every one of you with me along the way.

 

Go Winnie’s Warriors!!

 

Love and hugs,

Winnie xo

 

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This entry was posted on October 26, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #45 | Labour of Love

Hello Everyone:

 

Happy Labour Day – it’s September 1st here in Toronto. 3 years to the day I finished my last of 25 radiation treatments. Woohoo!! I always like to mark these days. Tonight I had dinner at my favourite Japanese restaurant in old Chinatown with some old friends which was nice. J

 

One thing that has happened to me lately is that my taste buds are getting all messed up again. I have been having a terrible time with that ‘metallic’ taste again in my mouth. (Started during my chemo treatments). It started a while ago and it came and went and it was infrequent. Now, it’s pretty constant and frequent. For a while I thought I was imaging it. But I met someone recently who had radiation about 10 years ago and she says it happens to her quite a lot. It’s changing my palette again. So, wine is becoming not so enjoyable. Back to vodka and single malt scotch.  **sigh…..I guess it could be worse. A lingering side effect. No one ever mentioned that to me before. Quite frankly, it’s a pain and it bugs me. But, on the bright side, at least my lymphedema is not bothering me as much anymore – that, and I’ve learned to just let it not bother me so much.

 

Recently I had been approached by the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation, Womens’ College Hospital and Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation to participate in various events and projects. I have done a few things here and there in the past and I used to think about it quite a bit as although I wanted to be ‘out there’ and help, I sometimes felt a little afraid. A little too exposed  and vulnerable if I did. But after much thought and deliberation, I have decided that I am going to do what I can and in any way I can to help. After all, having cancer and being so lucky as to be able to continue to live a life as I do, is something I shouldn’t hide or be ashamed or embarrassed about. As my mother keeps telling me, I give people HOPE. I certainly hope I do! So here is what I’ll be doing in the next couple of months:

 

  • Appearing in the Annual Report of the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation – where they share and highlight stories of people who have and are living with cancer.
  • Allowing for my image to be used in the “Stand up to Cancer” telethon being hosted by Gwyneth Paltrow
  • Being the guest speaker to a group for the Reconstruction Clinic at Women’s College Hospital – to share my story to those who are considering the surgery. And possibly disrobing – I’m struggling with that part. But in the end, I guess it’s just another body part – and in the big scheme of things – should it really matter if it can really make a difference to someone else who is tentative and scared and wondering what she should be doing?? I guess not – – but I’m still shy deep down. J

 

I am going to attach the photo that I have given the CBCF to use for the annual report and the Stand up to Cancer event. It was taken last year in Beijing by my aunt, Julia.

 

Here is the blurb that is going into the report:

The role model: Winnie Go

No one expect to find a lump. But that’s exactly what Winnie Go found after a game of golf. Only 37 years old at the time, Winnie was not just surprised by what she had discovered, she was downright scared.  When the doctor confirmed it was breast cancer and that it had spread to her lymph nodes, friends and family naturally expected Winnie to focus on her personal care and treatment. But Winnie decided that a diagnosis of breast cancer was not the end of her journey; it was just the beginning. With her support network – now known affectionately as “Winnie’s Warriors” – decided that while she needed to take care of herself, it was equally important for her to do as much as she could for others facing a similar battle. Bolstered by this conviction, Winnie threw a party and shaved off her hair, donating it to children with cancer. She also raised over $8,000 for the Wig Salon that evening. Winnie doesn’t know where her journey will lead her, but she has dedicated herself to a life of “I wills” rather than “Will nots,” letting other women know they are not alone in facing this disease and doing what she can to creating a future without breast cancer.

 

It’s really crazy sometimes when I read things like this and share my story. But I have been told that my story, like many others, is very personal and compelling and meaningful to those that read it whether they are going through treatments, and/or living with cancer or beaten the damn disease. So I labour on – with mixed feelings at times, but in the end, I feel like a good citizen, proud to do my part. I have been to the Wig Salon to help a friend pick out the perfect wig, hats and scarves; visited a friend of a friend who is dealing with a very serious and pretty much terminal cancer and saw an old friend who is battling for the second time and really killing it all in the last month. It all reminds me of what I have been through, and although sometimes I feel drained and very emotional I feel very good to know that I can be a quiet strength and comfort to someone. And that, makes it all worthwhile. J

 

Time for bed. I need my beauty sleep. That, and my secret hope that my hair and eyebrows will grow faster when I’m sleeping!! LOL!! (unlikely)

 

Love, Winnie xo

 

Winnie Beijing

This entry was posted on September 1, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #44 | Run! Run! Run! … … Again!

Hello fellow Warriors:

 

As many of you know, I participated in the Run for the Cure back in 2011 for the first time, right after the end of my treatments. I had found the experience quite overwhelming since I was running for “ME”. The slogan is: “Who are you Running For?”

 

Last year, 2013, 18 Warriors strapped on their running shoes, wind jackets and mittens (it was cold and rainy!) and went out for the 5 KM trek. We raised over $10,000 for the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation. A few people who couldn’t make it last year, want to join the team so here we go again!!

 

So, I have renewed my team again, and Winnie’s Warriors will be set to run again.

 

If you feel so inclined, please join my team. I’ve ordered more hats! J I’ll be running again or at least try to (if I get the same challenge as last year). If we have 10 members before September 19th, we will get team t-shirts with the team name printed on it! J

 

There is a $40 participant fee that is charged to all participants to cover administrative costs of the event that is waived if you raise over $150. THAT SAID, for those Warriors who raised more than $150 last year, if you register, enter “Loyalty” in the redemption code and use your same login/password as 2013 and the $40 is waived.

 

The event date is Sunday, October 5th. Location: Toronto (usually starting at Hart House at U of T).

 

Use the link below to join my team, or if you wish, make a donation:

 

http://www.runforthecure.com/site/TR/RunFortheCure2015/CentralOffice?px=1990298&pg=personal&fr_id=1889

 

Look forward to seeing you there if you can!

 

Winnie xo

(Team Captain of Winnie’s Warriors).

 

RunCure100613

This entry was posted on August 19, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #43 | Life & Health

Hello Everyone:

 

I finally did my ‘annual’ physical with my family doctor (almost 2 ½  years late). And the results are in: my blood work was amazing she said. Cholesterol level at 1.88. She said whatever I am doing to keep doing. I haven’t gotten any shorter and my weight has stabilized back to ‘normal’ & my pulse is strong and steady. Even better, is that my blood pressure that I have been taking pills for to control over the past 10 years, seemingly is under control now and very normal. 120/80. I actually stopped taking them (on my own accord – not usually recommended). I have been going for regular follow ups and so far so good. I’ll have another check of my blood pressure at the end of the month and fingers crossed, if it’s normal – no more medication for that!

 

I went to the new After Cancer Transition Clinic at Women’s College Hospital for my first appointment in April. It is a clinic that works in conjunction with Princess Margaret Hospital. Dr. Townsley was very nice and is my new ‘point person’ who will touch base with me once a year, along with my surgeon to make sure things are on track and don’t go awry. I think it’s better to have the clinic away from the chemo/radiation units. Less depressing. One thing she mentioned was they are recommending that people take Tamoxifen for 10 years instead of 5 years. Initially when they did studies between groups that had taken the drugs for 5 and 10 years there wasn’t much difference. However now, a number of years later, they are finding the patients who have taken the drug for at least 10 years fare much better overall. Guess that means another 7 years to go for me. So much for wishing away the hot flashes and the bad hair growth. *sigh

 

I also had my annual check-up with my gynecologist and he had check my estrogen levels last year and thought things looked pretty good and there was a good chance that my ‘flow’ would become a regular visitor again. However, after being on Tamoxifen for another year, things have changed significantly. My estrogen is very low. Since my cancer was hormone positive it’s a good thing I guess. So it’s probably official that I will be getting wrinkles soon!! In cases like mine, hormone replacement therapy is not really recommended but my doctor said there are some low dose options but I don’t think I want to risk it. I am going to have to figure out how to grow old gracefully and sooner than I thought. I was counting on my “yellow” genes to keep me looking young longer, but alas, even that might not be enough. :p

On a more serious note – means I won’t be having any of my own offspring (too bad world!). I’ve accepted and come to terms with it. Although I did think that because of my age and spinster status that I wouldn’t have kids of my own – it was hard sometimes because at the end of the day it wasn’t my choice. So simply Auntie Winnie I will remain.

 

It’s amazing how you can be healthy, feel good and all of a sudden get hit with something. It happens all the time. Whether it be cancer, some ailment or even catching some bug/bacteria.

We need to always been aware of our health and not take it for granted.

 

It’s D-Day. 70 years ago today those brave & frightened souls – many mere younglings, landed in Operation Neptune.

I was doing some reading on it. Nearly 200K soldiers were delivered into the theatre of Normandy. To most of us, we will never truly understand nor appreciate what transpired during those fateful hours, but what we can do is take some time to reflect, and respect.

Now – THAT is being BRAVE and courageous in the face of great adversity!! I can’t even imagine – I can still visualize the opening scene of the movie, Saving Private Ryan. . . . . Yikes! (And I closed my eyes during part of it).

 

Take care. Keep well. Happy & Healthy.

Love Always, Winnie xoxo

This entry was posted on June 6, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #42 | As Time Goes By

Hello Everyone:

Happy Spring!! Apparently it arrived in Toronto officially as of March 20th, but we got another 5 cm of snow Friday night and even more up north. Good thing I’m still skiing or able to. Although on Saturday there was so much snow, that I felt that I was skiing moguls. Very difficult conditions. I had to take an Epsom salt bath when I got home to help with the burn and ache. (*le sigh).
The bitter cold has left me feeling quite arthritic on some days. Not good for my skiing form when my instructor tells me to shift my hips from side to side to create my ‘edges’.  Boy, do I ever feel geriatric sometimes. :p  LOL!!  He says that it’s just like dancing – but I’m very sure that I don’t look so uncoordinated when I’m dancing!! (I’d better practice in the mirror just in case). HAHA.

Time. We have to remind ourselves how precious it is. How we need to make the most use of it and love and live. It goes by seemingly so quickly. Four years ago I was healthy, working hard and living life. Three years ago I finished a full, rigorous chemo schedule and was preparing to have major surgery to remove some bad body parts. And now, thankfully, I’m back to being healthy, working hard and living life again…. Just a little more “creaky” than before.

I had my annual mammogram – and it has come back fine. Phew. Although with everything they are saying about mammograms these days, who knows how accurate or helpful they are?!

As I was thinking about my overall health, I figured I’d better find out when I had my last full physical check-up. To my horror, my doctor’s office said it was December 2011. A couple of months after I finished radiation. I thought REALLY?! This is what can happen if you don’t advocate for yourself or keep track of your personal health care – you get lost in the mix. I now have an appointment for early April and insisted that they do full blood work and everything. Maybe I have been subconsciously avoiding it. (I am afraid I suppose?!) I guess that can happen after what I’ve been through. I might be developing an aversion to hospitals and doctors (Sorry Mom – won’t be marrying a surgeon after all LOL!)..Stay tuned!

So I continue to move forward, live life and try to be upbeat and age gracefully as time goes by. And since I am already forty, this is my new mantra to aspire to from a fashion icon:
“Personne n’est jeune après quarante ans mais on peut etre irresistible a tout age.”
Translation: No one is young after forty, but one can be irresistible at any age.  Coco Chanel (1883-1971)

I was reading, “French Women Don’t Get Facelifts” by Mireille Guiliano. I share with you a passage from the chapter pertaining to Attitude:
“”Quelle Coquette!” A nice compliment a woman can get from a man or a woman. It’s a hard one to translate, but basically it signifies someone who is concerned about her appearance, someone who has a knack for fashion, but who also desires to gain admiration, to please, play, flirt or seduce, or all of the above depending on the circumstances. When it’s done a certain way – and to me it takes a woman at ease with herself and knowing herself – it shows. Balzac said it best, “La coquetterie ne va bien qu’a une femme heureuse”. Being coquette suits only a happy woman.”

So I guess Stephane, the owner/chef of my favourite restaurant in Paris, L’Ami Jean – wasn’t far off about me. He actually wrote when he signed my menu as a souvenir back in January when I was in Paris with the ladies!! Imagine that?!
I am a happy woman, finally at ease with myself and I have learned a lot about myself in the last few years and really know myself now. Amazing.

There are two things that save us in life, according to Indian journalist and novelist Tarun J. Tejpal: love and laughter. If you have one of the two, all is well. If you have both, you are invincible.

Laughter boosts one’s mood – so laugh out loud, a lot and often.
Love keeps us balanced, offering security and shelter to our souls. That’s why it is so important that we reach out to each other regularly. It’s work, but it’s worth it!! So my goal as mentioned in an earlier writing is to try and reach out and see as many of my Warriors as possible in the next year. Sadly, I have lost touch with a couple but I am going to renew my efforts! After all, it has been all of you that have helped me and continue to help me through the good and bad days.

You all keep me laughing and feel loved. And it’s going to keep us all healthy and living long and happy lives!!
Thank you for supporting me. As for Love & Laughter: I know I have both, so I should be feeling invincible…..well, sort of….LOL!!

Always, Winnie
“Quelle Coquette”.
P.S. I have included a recent photo from an “Oscar Night” event I attended with one of my Warriors. (No hair envy for me that night!!) LOL.
Enjoy the sunshine.

 

Red carpet 26Feb14

This entry was posted on March 24, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #41 | Trust & Hope

Hello Everyone:

Cancer.  Still everywhere and all kinds and types. I know I am one of the lucky ones.

I attended the funeral today of a friend of mine who fought valiantly and bravely but at the end, cancer won. He was only 34. All through his journey, my friend continued to have a spark and an amazingly positive attitude throughout. He never gave up hope that he would return to work and continue to live and experience life. I think it is our belief in the trust and hope we have placed in ourselves and an inner-strength that carries and helps us during these times.

HOPE. It is a good friend.
TRUST. Helps to bring the mind at ease.

Whatever any outcome is, keep Hope and Trust close by. We trust that we are doing the right things and hope that because of that we will be able to see them through.

I trust each and everyday that I am doing the right things to live a healthy and happy life. That said, I also hope that it stays that way. With the number of recurrences that happen, it’s hard not to think about it. Especially on days like today when I know that cancer has taken a friend away. Truthfully, I get a little frightened.

To my “office little brother”:
You have left us all some wonderful memories. Your care and devotion will still be a guide. And though we cannot see you, those who knew you will still have you by their side.

Be happy. Smile a lot. Trust and Hope.

Love, Winnie

This entry was posted on January 24, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #40 | Short & Sweet

Hello Everyone:
First off, Happy and Healthy 2014 to all. I know this message is a few days later than I wanted to send out as I wanted to have written 40 Winnie‘s Warriors messages by the end of 2013. Close though!

I’m sitting in a cafe in my favourite place – the City of Lights. And lights there are! It is still quiet festive here in Paris with buildings lit up in blue glow and Christmas trees hanging on wires mid street St Honore among others. The Place Vendome is as fabulous as ever, all while waiting for the Ritz Carlton to re-emerge from renovations.
I’m here with 5 ladies and what a blast. We had dinner at my favourite restaurant, L’Ami Jean and received 5-star treatment. We had the tasting menu and it was delicious! Not sure if it’s normal but we each got 4 dessert courses!! (Not including the cheese after the mains). We were all happy for the little walk back to the metro. The chef even gave us all a gift of a little cook-book of stories and recipes.

I ended 2013 on a high note. I went to see the Nutcracker with BFFs Chris and Jim. An older woman came through the crowds to specifically say that she had to tell me I was “stunning”. And that she knows a thing or two being that she was nearly 80 years old. How sweet and unexpected. I must admit that at the end of the day, no matter how much “hair envy” I get from time to time, this short crop really rocks. Most of the comments I get are from women and older ones. It’s wild. To think that not in a million years that I would have voluntarily done this (without reason as I actually did do it voluntarily….)

So needless to say, I’ll be staying with the short crop and go incognito every now and then when the occasion or outfit calls for some wild and fabulous long locks. (or blond ones). LOL.

One of the ladies in my Paris group is always saying that the present is a gift. She couldn’t be more right. The present is a true present that we get to enjoy every morning we are blessed enough to get out of bed and have our feet touch the floor (right Bernie?!).

May we all learn to appreciate and enjoy our present as we should.

See each and everyone of you soon and in 2014 (I hope!!). I am officially back to my pre-cancer illness fighting weight! 🙂

Winnie xoxo

This entry was posted on January 8, 2014.

Winnie’s Warriors #39 | Exposed!

Good day everyone!

 

It’s starting to feel a lot like Christmas! Snow everywhere and really cold weather in Toronto. It’s a little milder today but we are bracing for more snow and icy conditions in the next few days.

 

A little update. I saw my plastic surgeon on Monday. I think he did a good job reconstructing after my mastectomy but I told him I feel like I’m a little lop-sided sometimes. :p  He said that he had to shake his head after I said that. He told me I should go to “BRA” day sometime. (Breast Reconstruction Awareness day). I said, I kind of have sort of been there since they showed ‘me’ for reference. (They had asked my permission to show my photos and I thought, “why the heck not?”. If it can help someone make that crazy decision, it is a good thing!). So I have now been ‘exposed’ and have had my reconstructed breast flashed on a screen for hundreds to see! He actually told me that when they had my photos up (sans my face of course) that some people had said, “I want those!!”. LOL. You have to laugh about it.

 

Now of course I told him that it was natural for him to say it was an amazing outcome since he did the work – but he assured me that not all reconstruction jobs are not equal – even done by him – so I told him I was going to have to see some other patients in the flesh!!

 

It’s not perfect – nor will it ever be. But I have accepted the way it is now. There is no other choice. We’ve done the best we can.

 

I saw my OT for my lymphedema. We measured and I have a little bit of swelling in the upper arm. I haven’t done any swimming or self-treatment in the last while so I may have to wear my sleeve a little more often but it’s not too bad. Although I wake up many mornings feeling numbness and swelling in my right hand, it usually rights itself later in the day. As my OT says, Lymphedema is a chronic ailment. You can never get rid of it. But I watch for the signs and can feel the swelling so I am mindful of it. Apparently that’s half the battle.

 

I don’t know if it’s the cold dry weather here, but my radiated skin on my upper back is very sensitive. Very rough and scaly. Not my usual extremely soft skin. I hope it settles down again. It’s annoying and uncomfortable. It hasn’t been this bad since I had treatment on it. I may try and get a body scrub…..I’m too young to give up on backless dresses!

 

Wishing everyone the best of the festive season. Good health and happiness. Because life is not about the number of breaths we take but about the moments that take our breath away. J

 

Cheers to having many, many moments that take your breath away!

 

LOVE, Winnie xo

This entry was posted on December 20, 2013.