Winnie’s Warriors #28 | The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

Greetings everyone:
 
As we are closing in on the end of 2012 in Toronto, just thought I’d send a quick update.
 
The Good:
My cyst that I had removed at the end of November was benign. Phew. And double phew. Although I didn’t think it would be anything, the best thing I could have done was to get it removed and tested. Peace of mind. And a new scar…….
 
The Bad:
My right arm has started to swell a little more. It has been a little more sensitive as of late. The problem with having the constant risk of lymphodema is that no matter how careful one is, it could happen. Furthermore, it can affect you months or years after surgery and treatment. I’m taking extra care now and wearing my compression sleeve  more often to try and control it.
The Ugly:
I’ve had a couple of scares of serious swelling. I woke up on December 22nd and thought, “well, the world didn’t end……according to the Mayan calendar on December 21st and I wake up the next day with my arm and hand swollen up….REALLY?!”.  My hand was so swollen that I couldn’t even make a fist and a ring that I wear as a gauge didn’t even go past my first knuckle on my finger. To top it all off, December 22nd was a ‘chemo treatment day’ so I was a feeling a little sensitive. Fortunately over the course of the day, the swelling went down and I managed to get a lymphatic drainage massage which helped. Unfortunately, I’ve had a couple of flare ups since. I guess it’s just part of the overall process…….*le sigh.
 
Overall, this experience has highlighted the importance of living our dreams while we can. I have had a few friends lose loved ones recently. Health can fail quickly and the ears and eyes can let us down. But we have to strive to move forward. Taking a lesson and learning from the insight into the future and be ready and willing to partake in it as much as we are able to. The future is full of challenge and with 2013 around the corner (actually in 5 minutes in Toronto), I feel very optimistic about things in general. I know that we are all so thankful to have seen another year and I wish everyone good fortune and great health.
 
Last words for 2012: thank you from the bottom of my heart to all of you, my friends and family who have carried me through the last year.
 
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
 
Love and hugs,
Winnie xoxo
This entry was posted on January 1, 2013.

Winnie’s Warriors #27 | Remembrance Day

Hello Everyone:
 
It’s Sunday, November 11th. Remembrance Day. I thought a good day to sit down and write my latest update. I’ve just spent the last hour reading through my Winnie‘s Warriors emails. Remembering all that has happened in the past couple of years. It was actually 2 years ago yesterday that I had my first chemo treatment. Amazing. I spent last night at a charity event, Smiles of Innocence. Doing what I love doing…..getting dressed up, eating, having a couple of glasses of wine, dancing in my stilettos and bidding on silent and live auction items. LOL!! I am the proud owner of a 5 litre bottle of Chianti. Good thing I never gave up drinking….
 
As mentioned in my last update, I was working on a plan on how I was going to mark ‘my day’. November 1st. As many of you know, Paris is one of my favourite cities in the world. And on my last trip this summer, I was remarking that I had never been to the base of the Arc de Triomphe let alone the top. One night before going to sleep the Arc de Triomphe flashed into my mind. And then it hit me that THAT was where I wanted to be on my day. I thought it was very appropriate seeing that it is a triumphal arch. It describes how I feel about my journey so far and how I feel that I have come through it all. Triumphant.
 
A few facts on the Arc de Triomphe:

 

  • The largest triumphal arch in existence from 1836-1982.
  • Height 50 m (164 ft).
  • Construction ordered by Napoleon in 1806 so that his soldiers would ‘return home through archs of triumph”.
  • Completed in 1836, long after Napoleon’s death in 1821.
  • Located at the end of the Champs-Elysees, in the middle of the Place Charles de Gaulle, a large circular square from which no less than 12 streets emanate.
  • Observation deck: 234 steps up. No elevator.

 

Two of my warriors were with me on November 1st – my BFFs  – Chris & Jim. We went to the Arc de Triomphe together. The weather was a little suspect. Quite windy and it had started to rain. The line up to buy tickets to get to the top was very long……it was also All Saints Day (a holiday) – so I think more crowds than normal for a Thursday. So we decided to walk around the base. I also thought that I might get blown off the top of the Arch if we went up. I wasn’t even thinking about the stairs at that point……..I was just happy and thrilled to be there with Chris & Jim as my support pillars in case I cracked. I also decided to go up to the top the next night in order to see the City of Lights in all her glory. That made more sense. We celebrated my day that evening at Le Chateaubriand. I wore an outfit my Aunt Julia bought me in Hong Kong, and of course, donned on the ‘blond wig’ as I do when I am marking and celebrating special dates in this journey.
Paris-20121101-00152
I received lots of messages of hope, congratulations and good wishes from many of you. At times reading them brought tears to my eyes. It was a little overwhelming. Thank you!! Merci beaucoup. Grazie mille.
The next evening, I had dinner reservations at Epicure at Le Bristol Hotel.  A fantastic 3 star Michelin restaurant where I was going to treat myself and celebrate and be in my own thoughts. I decided to go to the top of the Arc just before. I arrived at the base at 8:30 p.m and bought my ticket without any lineup. It wasn’t until I gave my ticket to the gatekeeper that I remembered the stairs…..234 steps up. Good thing I had my flats with me…..I did manage to get to the top without stopping. I think it was because I had had a bit of practice training in the days leading up to my ascent as the apartment I rented had no elevator and 93 steps to get to upstairs! The view was spectacular. Especially with the lights. I breathed it all in…..in style too – put on my stilettos and was wearing a little black dress……no jeans or sneakers for this gal for this moment! I was channelling my inner Coco Chanel. LOL.
Paris-20121102-00155
I bought an agenda that I saw in a window. It says on the cover:
J’ai décidé d’être heureux parce que c’est bon pour la santé. Si vous voulez être heureux, SOYEZ-Le!
Translated: I decided to be happy because it is good for the health. If you want to be happy – BE it!
I was very happy to be able to do and make this trip. A little last minute but worth it! All part of living and experiencing life to the fullest. I thought of all of you while I made my journey up to the top of the Arc de Triomphe and kept you close to my heart.
The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; (although I have the very best friends and family……all of you!) they just make the best of everything they have.
“Life isn’t about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.”  It’s going to rain tomorrow in Toronto. I’m going to try it……but on the safety of my balcony!!
Bisous. (Kisses)
Winnie xo
This entry was posted on November 11, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #26 | The Check Up

Hello Everyone:
 
I spent the better half of a day today between Women’s College and Princess Margaret Hospitals. Working on completing my reconstruction – it’s quite the process and sometimes I think people don’t do everything, but I figured, I’ve gone through this much and be through so much that I might as well try and see it through all the steps. That is happening at Women’s College. I also showed my plastic surgeon a bump that I had found last October (which I did an ultrasound on – and I was told it was a lyphoma; aka fat blob), that has grown over the past year – he thinks it’s a cyst and I am going to have it removed. They say that it won’t become anything cancerous – but I’m going to remove it anyhow. Might as well do something that is considered ‘cosmetic surgery’……..not covered by OHIP. Hope he gives me a ‘repeat patient discount’! LOL!
 
My visit to Princess Margaret was with my medical oncologist. I have to say that being in that hospital where I did my chemo and radiation treatments gives me chills still. The waiting room of the second floor Breast Clinic was full. Patients and their support teams. Lots of women with scarves on their heads. Some sad faces. Some teary. Some smiles. Mine was of relief that I didn’t have to be there every three weeks anymore. Phew.
 
A volunteer finally called my name and said she needed to weigh me in. I’ve gained a couple of kilos since radiation. I’m hoping that it’s because I’m building muscle mass again……One can only hope. I sat in Room 15 for awhile before a young lady came in. She asked me if I was on Tamoxifen? I said “yes – since June 2011”. She asked me how it was going? I said, “how is it supposed to be going?” It came out kind of funny – but I really don’t know what to expect from this drug so I said, “hot flashes and weight gain”. She said that’s normal. She went on to ask me if I had been taking the pill everyday and around the same time. I answered yes. Then she asked me how I remember to take it everyday. To which I said, “I just do”. She then asked me if I had missed any days since I started and if I was sure of it. At this point I was having a hot flash and thought that she was going to get a ‘flash’ of my temper! So I took a deep breath, fanned myself a little and said, “when you are doing something that you hope is going to potentially help lower the risk of reoccurence, I would imagine you don’t forget”. *I then flashed her a ‘smile’. . . . Needless to say, she thanked me and left the room.  :p
 
When the doctor came in, I told him about the cyst. He said it was mobile, so not stuck to anything, and I could remove it so it doesn’t grow bigger and if it was causing me discomfort. I told him that it does give me some pain when I touch it, to which he said, “that’s a good thing”. As I mentioned before, breast cancer doesn’t really present itself or cause one pain. Another Phew. I wasn’t sure what to expect from this meeting. It was my first one after radiation. I’ve only done a mammogram in the past year. And that’s on my good side. People always ask me if I’m “in the clear” or “have you had any tests to make sure the cancer hasn’t come back”? So I ask him if they do any blood work. He said “no”. He said that the chance of getting breast cancer on the good side is low. That on the affected side, I’d have to watch for any symptoms – like around the scars for anything unusual. He said other than that, if the cancer should show up somewhere else, i.e. the bones, I would have bone pain that wouldn’t go away. I know what that feels like and I definitely don’t want to experience it again. He felt my nodes on my neck, listened to me breathe, and tapped my entire back. And, that was it. See you next year. Quite uneventful – but at the end of the day, the kind of appointment you want.
 
As I left the hospital, I purchased a couple of tickets to the Princess Margaret Home Lottery……..I wouldn’t mind winning a car, and besides, it’s for a good cause. Outside PMH they have walls put up around the perimeter for the Weekend to Conquer Cancer Walk. People have written words of hope, memories and tributes to loved ones lost, and survivors’ words of inspiration. Made me think of theWinnie‘s Warriors I wrote on the Wall of Hope at last year’s Run for the Cure. I was a little overwhelmed by it. This past Sunday, September 30th was the Run for the Cure. I know a few of you offered to make the trek with me this year – but I wasn’t up for it. Maybe next year, or some other event that will directly help those in need – of unaffordable drugs, home care, a wig, or hat.
 
As many of you know, I consider November 1st “my day”. It was the date (2010) that I shaved off my hair pre-chemo to donate to help make a wig for children with cancer. That was a choice that gave me some control or say in dealing with this illness. It was the day I started my fight. It was the night, as Keri put it, “I held court in the wine bar at Centro”, when I looked at so many friends and family with tears in their eyes and somehow, had the strength to stop my own tears as Brian put the razor to my head. I don’t know where that strength came from. WOW. What a night!!
 
I had asked a few of you to save this date as I was thinking about marking my second year. After much thought, and since a few of my local Warriors are not going to be in town, I’m going to post-pone the get together for now. BUT, I am still going to mark my date. Working on the details…….you’ll get the full story in my next update.
 
So to close, I share with you these thoughts:
 
“Life is not a someday thing or a one day thing. It is a right now, every day thing.” And I am working on living and doing things ‘right now’.
 
“Ignore people who say it can’t be done. No matter what the statistics say, there’s always a way. Feed your hopes, not your fears. Fight for the greater good. Know in your heart that all things are possible. Treat all setbacks as temporary and always remember that you are never alone. Life is the grand adventure and any life worth living is worth recording”. 
 
Wishing everyone, Courage – every day.
 
Winnie xo
This entry was posted on October 2, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #25 | Another Milestone

Hello Everyone:
I trust that everyone has been enjoying the summer? The weather in Toronto has been pretty good all in all.

Another milestone has passed. Saturday, September 1st was my one year anniversary of my final radiation treatment!! And since I like to get out of town to reflect, I went out of town for a few days. Last year, I went to New York, USA. This year, I went to another country….Quebec (haha). Well at least it seems like another country!!

I spent an evening in Quebec City. Haven’t been there since the early 90s. Don’t think much has changed. Then drove out to the Charlevoix region. Very scenic and beautiful. Visited little towns, Baie Saint Paul and La Malbaie. Ended up staying in La Malbaie – it was close to the water. Now I didn’t have any reservations for accommodation so went to the Tourist information office to see what might be available. A few spots on Friday but as it was the long weekend most places were fully booked except one. So I went up there. I can’t even remember the name of the place but I have nick-named it “The Shining”. The stairs creaked and all the doors of the rooms were open. Eerily quiet. Not another soul in sight. She took me to room 128. The only one left available for Saturday. I took a look, turned around and decided I’d take my chances in finding someplace else. That and because I could have any room I wanted for Friday night – it was empty!! Hence, “The Shining”.

So I stayed at the 3 Canards on Friday. I had heard they have a great gastronomic restaurant. There was a nice balcony and view of the bay and an outdoor pool. I swam that night and in the morning sun. It was great. I had hoped for a cancellation for the rest of the weekend, but it was not to be. But as luck would have it, I found a fully equipped 1000 sq ft condo with a large terrace facing the bay. It was perfect. I was able to seal the deal “tout en francais”. =). What I find strange is that even though they know you don’t speak much french, they continue to let you struggle when they can speak english. So much for welcoming tourism!! Anyhow, good thing I am good with numbers. (LOL).
I had great homemade local food (fois gras, duck confit, fresh red ahi tuna and veggies). It was peaceful, relaxing and quiet. Even walked a roundtrip 5 kms for bread…..I misjudged the distance when I had set out. Good thing I wasn’t wearing stilettos!!

One of the strangest things I saw while I people-watched at a local spot “Cafe Chez Nous” having coffee one morning was a woman who had her dog in a backpack-holster like contraption hanging off her back with all its legs/paws sticking forward. Seemed awkward and a little uncomfortable….for the dog! “Oh well – those Quebecois” was all I thought.

I have continued to sport the short crop. Although it has grown in a bit more since I cut it last June. So, as promised, here is the pic:
(I keep being told that I look “a thousand times better”……wonder what I looked like before?!)
Short Crop 6Sep12
I’m feeling better and better every day. And will soon start on getting stronger and building back my strength. It’s strange sometimes, when I think back to the events of the past couple of years. I find that it’s more emotional now. Maybe because I’m starting to appreciate more all the fight I had in me and all that I have now. I was so focused on getting past the illness that I didn’t stop to smell the roses……Well, I’m starting to do more of that now!!
 
See you all soon I hope. Thank you always for your support.
Merci et a tres bientot!
 
Winnie xoxo
This entry was posted on September 11, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #24 | Strike a Pose!

Hello everyone:
 
Summer is finally here – officially that is. The temperature in Toronto has been soaring. New highs made in the last couple of days.
 
On June 7th, I was the guest speaker and participating model in Show We Care Fashion Show. A charity event put on by Women’s Fitness of Canada in support of Womens’ cancers and the Wig Salon at Princess Margaret Hospital. There were over 300 people who attended the event and they have raised nearly $50,000 for a great cause. I have to say that I was a bit nervous just prior to the start of the event. Not because I was going to be wearing Lululemon and doing a shimmy (zumba style) to LMFAO’s “I’m Sexy and I Know It” song, but because although I have done some public speaking and media work in the past, (although not to such a large live audience), the topic was so personal I wasn’t sure how it was going to turn out. A few friends and family showed up for support. I made sure that they were all in the same area, then I chose purposely not to look in that direction when I gave my speech. I knew that one look of acknowledgement would turn into a flood of tears. I think it all went well. It was quite frankly so overwhelming. The number of people who came up to me afterwards, the applause I received during parts of my story was incredible. People called me brave. Strangers hugged me. Women told me how inspiring my words were. Simply amazing.
 
Since it was a benefit for the Wig Salon, I decided to don on various wigs. A long curly/wavy one for the speech; a Cleopatra style for the fashion show to strut my stuff; and the blonde one to mark yet another significant event in my journey.
 
Here is my speech – which took me 5 minutes to share and , my “blonde” pose:
Show We Care 7 Jun 12
June 16th marked a year since my second surgery. Much easier to pass than the first surgery.
 
June 20, 2012: I got my hair cut again. Cut right down again.Very short and simple. Unfortunately my hair according to Brian hasn’t decided what direction it wants to grow back in and it’s like baby’s hair. Kind of messy and not that strong. It is times like this when I think it would be better to have been of european descent rather than asian. But that thought never last long, since I’ve never had to shave my legs in my life. LOL!!
But the big news is that I went to work afterwards “sans” wig. Big day. You can’t imagine the looks I’ve been getting. I’ll still wear wigs from time to time, but going au natural (now that I have a good tidy cut) is easier when people tell me how beautiful my face is, how nice to see the sparkle in my eyes, and most importantly, what a perfectly shaped head I have (Thanks Mom!!). Will send my pic on that the next time. It’s very “chic”.
 
Love and hugs to you all. As I mentioned in my speech, You, my Warriors, made all the difference in the world to me.
 
Winnie xo
This entry was posted on June 22, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #23 | McHappy Day

Hello dear family and friends:
 
It’s McHappy Day today. As I went through the drive-thru at McDonalds today (just to get a coffee…..no burger, or breakfast sandwich or fries….) they were collecting donations for McHappy Day. Upon which you were able to put your name on a paper shoe that was promptly posted on the window. Of course I donated, but put “Keri” on the boot – since we were chatting on the phone and she LOVES drive thru coffee and McD’s.
 
Aside from McHappy Day – – today, April 19th is the one year anniversary of my “slash” surgery. And, I have to admit, that I felt like I was on edge today (actually started last night). A little crack in the chink of my usually steadfast armour. I couldn’t help it. I relived the night before and the day of. I had a little tear. It was a pretty traumatic day and sometimes it takes time for one to really look back and consider in a thoughtful way what exactly happened. I know that you cannot change the course of what has happened in the past. That you have to let go to move forward. But I think that in this case, that once in a while, you have to remember to fully move forward. To remember the struggles sometimes, can help you move ahead. To remember and ponder helps you realize how far you’ve come and that in itself gives you a boost and strength to continue to drive on. To keep the nagging bad thoughts aside and at bay. This year, 2012 will have a few anniversaries for me. Chemo, surgery x 2, and radiation. I better buy some extra tissue!
 
To commemorate the day, I thought it would be appropriate to do some “retail therapy”. So I did what any gal in my position would do, and I bought a new bra! A “push-up” – – since I figured I needed a little “lift” today….LOL.
 
My brother and Naomi sent me a cookie-gram today. Very thoughtful and sweet. I guess all the years of spoiling him was not wasted after all…… 😛
 
It was a beautiful day today. Sunny and warm. Even drove my car with the top down.  I had some client meetings and went out to dinner with friends. Sported the ‘au natural’ hair today. No wig. It was liberating. Quite cool I thought.
 
This past weekend I was at a little “hen-fest” with a few gals (of which 2 others in the group had been struck with the same situation). You realize that there are so many different types and severity of breast cancer and the methods and treatments that people go through – some by choice and others just because it is protocol. But at the end of the day, it’s the same. It’s cancer. And we all need to accept and deal with it. No matter what kind we have or what treatments we have gone through. I share and tell my stories with my usual candor and slight humor. What has hit me the most in the last little while is how ‘inspired’ people around me are. It’s amazing. Truly. I am so humbled by the entire experience.
 
I close with a note given to me lately: “Winnie, Thanks for being such a great friend and inspiration. You make a difference in every life you touch with your spirit and kindness. Lots of good times ahead!”
Reading it makes me smile inside.
 
So, here’s to “lots of good times ahead”…..that I know we have had, and hope and know that we will share many more together.

Tanti Baci.
Winnie xo
This entry was posted on April 19, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #22 | Spring has Sprung

Hello Everyone:
 
Wishing all those who have celebrated and are celebrating Easter and Passover a very “hoppy” one!
 
We continue to get warmer than the usual seasonal weather here in Toronto. Hard to believe but on March 25th I actually went out and played my first round of golf for 2012. The local public course, the Don Valley, which I live across the street from, opened for the first time in March. I teed off around 11 a.m. It was a little chilly at first, however after the sun came out around 1 p.m. it was lovely. What was even better was just being out and about. I loaded up my golf pull-cart and hiked around the course (it is quite hilly). You have to hit over the river on the first tee box. Of course, I haven’t gone to the driving range and took two practice swings while waiting for the other golfers in my group to hit their balls. I figured I could rely on any natural talent that I had left……..slight miscalculation……my first swing of the day promptly trickled off to the side and down the path and into the water. Horror of horrors! Naturally, I smiled at my other golfers, picked up my ball and proceeded to the drop area on the other side. Ended up with a 6 on the par 4. The second and third holes were a struggle too. I just about decided to walk back to the club house. But there was a nice gentleman who wanted to offer “some advice” – – (I find that men like to do that sometimes….haha). Turns out that I was standing too far from the ball. (No wonder my ball was going to the right and not very far!!). Good advice. I made 2 pars on the front 9 and 2 pars on the back nine. Squeaked in a 96 despite the horrible start and 2 doubles to finish the round. And, best of all, after the first hole, I didn’t lose any other balls!
 
I had been following the Masters Golf Tournament in Augusta and was inspired to golf again. I went out Saturday – at Richmond Hill Golf Club and yesterday golf only 12 holes as I wanted to watch the last bit of the Masters (what an ending!) but recorded my first birdie of the season. I got a 3 on a par 4. The wind was going in my favour……
 
I am being careful with my arm and wearing my compression sleeve when I golf as I do when I travel. The thought of Lymphodema scares me but there is nothing I can do about it. Even if you follow all the advice on how to avoid it, you can still get it and it could happen at any time. Sometimes I think I have a little – – my right arm seems bigger to me – – I could measure and compare – – but I don’t want to really know. Besides, I think most people are not exactly symmetrical….and in the end, does it REALLY matter?! Probably not – unless I can’t wear my clothes!
 
My energy level is getting better. I have taken up swimming again – just a short 20 minutes of laps in my pool. I try and swim 2 to 3 times a week. Then a nice warm bath to relax my body. Working on getting my muscles working again (building them up for that matter). They’ve been asleep for awhile.
 
It’s amazing sometimes when I think about things. I didn’t feel so tired and drained before while going through treatments. (Or at least I didn’t notice as much). You have so much adrenaline during that time. Focusing on getting better, going to treatments, staying upbeat and positive that maybe you don’t notice how much you’ve beaten yourself up with the “Slash, Burn and Poison” treatment schedule. Or in my case “Poison (chemo), Slash (surgery) and Burn (radiation).
 
All and all I feel good and welcome the warmer weather, the sunnier and longer days. It’s quite windy outside today. So much so that I had to put my hand on the top of my head….you know, in case my wig blew off…..now that would be pretty funny!! I hope you are secretly smiling at the thought of that……
 
Big hugs to all.
And, I still haven’t had any McDonalds even though lent is over……I’ve been sticking with the Trucker’s Special.
 
Take care,
your “McWinnie” xo
This entry was posted on April 9, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #21 | The Leap Year

Hello Everyone:
 
It’s been a pretty tame and mild winter this year in Toronto. However today, Feb 29th – we are bracing for a huge storm to hit the province coming from mid-west USA. Apparently it’s already snowing like heck in some of the outer regions. But in the heart of the city – we usually get a beautiful sprinkling of picturesque snowfall and it’s gone in a matter of days.

Feb. 22nd was Ash Wednesday. The beginning of Lent. So I decided to give up eating McDonalds which I love so much. Both breakfast and lunch/dinner options. I tried to have it for breakfast the Sunday before Lent but just missed it by a few minutes. So I went to my favourite local diner, Hazel’s and had the “Trucker Special” 3 eggs, bacon, sausage, baked beans, pancakes (really the best I’ve had), toast and homefries (ok – I opted out of the homefries…LOL). After writing it all out, I think I’d better stop eating those too!! Haha.

One of the side effects of Tamoxifen which I am required to take for another 4+ years, (aside from the hotflashes) is weight gain. I’ve heard an average of 20 pounds…..(Yikes!) better hit the gym or even better: the golf course. Spring can’t arrive too soon for me. It would be awful for me to move on from my year of battling cancer to one where I am battling the bulge. What would I do with all my clothes?! Now Chris and Jim (my fab designers and BFFs) can work miracles but 20 lbs would be pushing it! *le sigh

I am hopeful that like the leap year, I will leap ahead in 2012. Back to a time where I feel and look more like myself. (On my visit to Manila, my dear cousin Kevin said: “Winnie‘s Warriors blog is the biggest scam of all time!” He said that I look better than ever! Gotta love family. :p ) To get back doing and participating in things I love. To be free and content in my life. And to continue enjoying my friendships with all of you; something which has never changed and I for that, I am eternally grateful.

Love and big hugs,
Winnie xo

This entry was posted on February 29, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #20 | Enter the Dragon

Hello Everyone:
 
Gong Xi Fa Chai! Happy New Year. I am in Taipei celebrating and welcoming the Chinese New Year which falls on January 23 this year. It is the Year of the Dragon. The only sign of the chinese zodiac that is a creature that you cannot see. Powerful and mystical. Mysterious and lucky. In the old days the dragon represented the king and only the king could wear the dragon symbol on his clothing. The year of the dragon is especially popular. Let’s hope it is a good one.
 
A couple of old things to note during the Chinese New Year:
 

 

  • Make sure your home is clean and tidy before the new year.
  • Don’t take throw out the garbage for 5 days after the new year – – or you are ‘throwing away your money’.
  • Take special care not to break any glass – bad luck.
  • Try not to make any enemies or quarrel with anyone.
  • Wear red underwear – for good luck.
  • Get a haircut.

 

This year being in Taipei is special. My maternal grandparents are both in their mid-80s and still healthy and full of life. My mother is the eldest of 8. And this year, all the siblings are here. My cousins will all make an appearance. It is rare for all of us to be together at the same time. My brother has brought his wife to meet my grandparents for the first time. We just finished having a pot luck dinner and will be together playing mah jong and maybe sing a few songs and ring in the new year at midnight.
 
I am sporting my very short hair. Just prior to coming to Asia and being the new year, I thought it very fitting to have my first haircut post-treatments. My hair had grown out quite a bit, but was getting a little unruly. I was beginning to have a ‘mullet’….not really my style! My trusty hair guru Brian and I decided to cut it down quite again to let it grow out again. The back is full, but the hair on the top is still a little thin. So let’s hope it grows back thicker this time around – – at least it’s black. But my hair really wants to curl!! However I have to say, I do enjoy wearing my wigs. I recently got one that is quite long. Goes down to the small of my back. I haven’t had hair that long since I was in my early 20s (yes – a long time ago…..). I’m having fun with it. Although the first morning after I cut my hair super short again that bothered me was that when I passed myself in the mirror and didn’t have much hair, I did get a little chill. It was a touch creepy – as I was reminded too much of when I was going through treatment. (Pre-hair cut, my morning hair was like Einstein’s – standing up on all ends and very curly – image that – – so it was a bit shocking after it was cut).
 
From time to time it is really hard to believe everything that has happened this past year. But as everything in life, we must soldier on and continue to face our daily tasks with a positive outlook and a cheerful disposition. We cannot change what has happened in the past. However, we can accept it, and take lessons and learn to make adjustments and drive forward.
 
I am grateful in knowing that this experience has changed my life for the better. It has made me a stronger person in body, mind and spirit.
 
Welcome to the Dragon.
 
Yours always, Winnie xo
This entry was posted on January 22, 2012.

Winnie’s Warriors #19 | Ready for the Holidays

Dear Family and Friends:
 
It’s been an interesting November and start to December. So much has happened in the past year. It was a year ago yesterday that I was sitting in a chair (fairly comfortable) having my second chemo treatment. Afterwards, my friend Joan and I went to Bistro 990 and had a fantastic dinner accompanied by a glass of wine. I think I shocked the waitress. (I had to ask her to put my meds in the fridge and make sure I didn’t forget to take them home!). We didn’t have a ride home (my dear brother came down to pick me up after dinner), as my original driver, Maddy – was unable to make it back to the hospital after leaving for a short while. She was sick – so I told her not to come back. All good intentions.
 
I have returned to my usual hectic pace of life. But in some ways, I am enjoying it much more. I am happier. Feeling freer. Smiling more. And trying not to let the ups and downs of the stock markets make me as quesy as the chemo did! Not easy on some days, but I can manage the stress much better. Although after a long day at the office, I do feel quite winded and still need a lot of rest to keep this ‘ol body going.
 
I am looking forward to putting up my little Christmas tree up again this year and the wreath on my door. I love the holidays and this year, I am looking forward to having some good cheer, without feeling bloated, puffy, sick or too tired. Going to find somewhere to ring in the new year in style – although last year – I was with dear friends and we had champagne and lobster!
 
So happy holidays to all of you, my dear family and friends. What a difference a year makes!
 
Big hugs. Wishing you all continued happiness and good health.
Cheers!
 
Winnie xo
This entry was posted on December 2, 2011.